Taking the Plunge

Over the holidays, one of my dear friends gifted our friend group with a book called “The 52 Lists Project” by Moorea Seal. Once a week, for 52 weeks, there is a new list to complete. Each list has a theme such as Goals and Dreams for this Year, Favorite Characters from Books, Movies, Etc., Happiest Moments of Your Life So Far, and so on. Our group agreed that we would share our lists every week before beginning the next one. We are only 4 weeks in and it is already one of my favorite things happening in 2016. Here’s why: the spirit of these lists highlights key elements of what comprises a healthy relationship (with Self and others) as well as a successful therapeutic experience:

HonestyOpennessWillingnessVulnerabilityAccountabilityReflectionLaughterConnection

No matter what brings people to therapy (in my experience), the common wish among clients is to find relief from feeling bad and hope to feel better. All of us need and deserve to feel heard, supported, loved, understood, and helped. To have the best chance of achieving those outcomes requires honesty, openness, and willingness to hear what you may not want (but need) to hear. Vulnerability, accountability, and reflection are essential to the process of developing a more informed, conscious relationship with yourself; each contributing in its own significant way to shining light on self-created barriers that keep you from finding fulfillment, meaning, and purpose. Laughter is just good medicine and a reminder that even when the sky feels like it’s falling, there’s always time for – and value in - taking a breather. And connection…what would we be without it? We would be islands. Islands can be beautiful, but, psychologically speaking, they function better as places of retreat, not ground for building a home.In this 52-week commitment that my friends and I have made, we are celebrating each other’s hopes and ideas; holding space for the things that make us feel afraid, unworthy, or alone; sharing the joy of our successes and the disappointment in our failures; respectfully acknowledging our differences; and, most importantly, challenging ourselves and each other to grow without putting limits on our capabilities. The net result of this exercise, so far, is that I know these women better than I did at the beginning of this month, and all of them have been in my life for at least a decade.The prompt for this week is: The Soundtrack of Your Life Right Now. Take some time to write this list for yourself. Who will you share it with? In this New Year, I invite you to risk stepping off your “island” and into connection with someone and/or something that feels both safe and unfamiliar all at the same time.