Word Candy

Springtime is rich with the spirit of renewal and resurrection in all its many forms.  As a therapist, I’m particularly interested in these themes as they relate to the healing process. It is very often the case that the origins of dysfunction and impairment begin with how we think about our experiences and, more specifically, how we imprison ourselves to thoughts that exacerbate our discomfort. We can become so deeply embedded in our faulty beliefs, sometimes to the point of being convinced there is no other reality than the one we’ve attached ourselves to. The darkness of that kind of self-imprisonment leaves very little room for something new to develop…similar to a Winter that refuses Spring’s arrival. Mother Nature’s assurance, though, that something as unpredictable and raw as Winter will eventually surrender its chill carries the hope that painful emotional injuries can find relief, too. Hope is ground zero for healing - the more we cultivate it, the better we feel.And, on that note…A couple of days ago I was standing on a chair peering into the depths of a rarely used kitchen cabinet in hopes of finding stray and usable plastic Easter eggs from years past. While I didn’t have luck in the egg department, I did find bags filled with Halloween candy from (many) moons ago. In the span of seconds, my thoughts vacillated between “Oh great! We can use this! I don’t have to go to Target again” and “This is totally gross. The gummy candy is definitely not gummy and Snickers’ must have a shelf-life, right?”. I quickly landed on a decision that the candy must go, and so it did. What stayed with me, though, were lingering thoughts about the impending accumulation of unwanted Easter candy and how much I would prefer to fill those darn eggs with something more meaningful and sustaining than empty calories.Enter: Lightbulb moment.This is not a suggestion to eradicate tradition as I, too, am a sucker for it, but rather an invitation to expand on it. Here’s what I propose: Filling plastic eggs and fertilizing neon green grass with candy as well as affirmations, encouragements, or pearls of perspective-taking wisdom relevant to the lives, age/stage, and emotional needs of each recipient. This is not meant to be an exercise in whacking yourself out trying to be profound or finding “just the right thing”.  This is about writing something as simple as: “I’m proud of you”; “Everything is going to be okay”; “You're not alone”; or, “My favorite part of every day is seeing you smile”. The list goes on. I know what it means to my clients when they feel seen, heard, and appreciated and I’m sure if you stop to think about how much those same things mean to you, you won’t miss an opportunity to pay that feeling forward.  Sure, you may still find a few leftover Malt Balls and Milk Duds hanging around, but helping someone feel hope for the arrival of something new never gets old.